so the last exciting dream i had was the one about my hot dream guy. i can remember only vaguely now what he looks like. sighs...

but anyway, last night, i had the longest most weirdest dream ever. i got back from school at ard 11 plus and i wanted to rest on my bed for a few minutes while i waited for the heater to warm up before taking my bath but guess what? i totally KO til morning. but here's the excting part. i dreamt....





THAT I MARRIED KHAIRI! LOL!

khairi, as in khairi johann. so anw, the dream came in 3 parts --

part 1: nani, khairi and i were at a party. and nani was going on and on about how she wanted khairi to settle down and khairi had the 'in one ear and out the other' attitude. then somehow we got to a point where nani told me and khairi to pretend that we were geting married and practise walking down the aisle. khairi was very annoyed but after a while he played along and then somehow he had some sort of enlightenment and HE decided that it was time to settle down too and he thought that nani was pairing him up with me so he agreed. then nani all happy that her brother is finally settling down went to bring another girl for him to marry and he got really angry and was accusing the both of us of playing him or something. i felt really really bad for him so i agreed to marry him. lol.

part 2: fast forward to a year later. i was apparently out of the country and khairi was again at some party alone. somehow he was narrating my dream and he was telling the story of how he's been cheating on me! but he was feeling guilty about it and he was really unhappy. and he drnking to drown his sorrows. LOL. (and no nani i dont really think this way about khairi. i do think he's a good boy. i really do!)

part 3: change of scene. probably fast forward to another time. it was a small apartment, very stuffy. there was a cot and a baby boy was inside. a very cute baby! and he was really sick. khairi and i were there. i picked the baby up and khairi was beside me. we were very worried about the baby so we ran down in the middle of night to catch a cab and bring him to the hospital. and then....

i woke up.

LOL. weirdest dream ever.

i have to thank dilz for kindly driving me home on many occasions these past few weeks. school is now my first home.

i shall upload comms ball photos once i get 'em from dinie...which might just be a very long time from now so til then...


in other news, publicity time!

i feel like a zombie. sometimes i'm not even thinking, i'm just doing. i'm just letting life take hold of me.

thank you lunch buddies for making my day yesterday. it was an escape that i really needed.

i really need to learn to take a break.

in the past 3 days i've had dinners with my old friends consecutively; wednesday with yati and sharini at swensens, yesterday with poppy, ranitha and thuts at pizza and and today with primary school friends at fish and co.



aside from the fantastic food, the dinners were just the thing i needed. a break.



i had piles of things to do and so much work to worry about but i told myself, to hell with all of that. just ahve a break zu. and it was really nice. especially today, sitting at starbucks chatting with my primary school friends about our kental days in school when we were young and had no care in the world whatsoever. we were recalling times when we were so into mtv and boybands and we used to all gather at my house to have dance and singing practices. we would sit around and quiz each other on the latest music and celebrity gossip and we would come up with the cheesiest dance steps which we thought so cool at that time to be performed in front of our friends in school. we must have been the subject of much gossip and entertainment for our acquaintances in school but none of us cared about what people thought of us. we were really in our own little world and it didnt even cross our minds to stop and think about what others might think about us. most importantly, we were happy and carefree.



today, 10 years down the road, i sit here and i realise a lot of things i do is influenced by the people around me. i stop and think a million times of how people might view me before i attempt to do something. it's extremely sad that our actions are restricted by societal perception and we impose such restrictions on ourselves to ensure that we fit in and not sidelined by society. in this moment, when i feel like i carry the weight of at least half the world on my shoulder that i wish my life could go on rewind and i would go back 10 years and live in that hapy carefree moment forever.



but oh well. responsibilities responsibilities. running away is not going to solve anything.

i've been packed to the brim with piles and piles of work and the work just keeps on coming! it's never ending! if this continues i think i'm going to have a nervous breakdown soon. God, i pray thee, help me.

so many things happened in the past week which i am just too tired to update about. birthday was okay. i had quite a fun one, what with nani very interesting and innovative and carefully planned presents, the surprise karaoke night courtesy of the spiffymiffies and the dinner party at my god mum's place. thank you to all everyone for your gifts and well wishes. turning 20 was made because of all of you.