i know i shouldnt but i'm slowly losing hope. i mean what do you do when you work reasonably hard and still get the same horrendous results? gp was a big disappointment. all my confidence in my ability to do languages has gone down the drain. c6 for french AO exam and now bare scraping through a pass for gp? my god how deluded i was thinking i was good in languages. and lets not talk about maths. i really know i'm not a maths person but not being able to pass it is just...it sucks big time.

i hate whining about results and study stress but i cant help it. it's frustrating. it's taking up so much of my energy. sigh but what to do? just gotta suck it all up and mug even harder. after this week i think i'll have to eradicate any form of social life i have for the sake of pulling my grades up. so looking forward to it.

i honestly am at a lost of what to do when i graduate from jc. i used to be positively sure that i would want to do comm studies in NTU but now i have my doubts. i would love to pursue a career in journalism but can i really do it? the competition is tough out there and you'd have to be the best of the best to see even the slightest light of success. i wish i could be more confident of myself and my capabilities but seriously, i dont feel like i have what it truly takes to excel in the field of journalism. so then what do i d? i thought of majoring in english lit at NUS, but is that really what i want to do? what's the job scope like for me with a lit degree? the most obvious career choice is becoming a teacher of course. but omg. i told myself a long time ago that i wouldnt become a teacher. but now it seems as if i'm moving towards that direction. not that it's bad becoming a teacher or anything but i always thought it was a dull mundane job that i didnt really want to go into. of course i could put colour into my teaching...but i dont know. everything in my head is a big confusing blur right now and i just wish i could decide what i want in life and stick to it, not to be faltered by anything or anybody.

somebody tell me what to do.